Ursa's Fate
by AvatarKyioshi
Summary: Nothing could describe the immense pain in my heart when I forced myself out of Ikem's grip. It was as though a part of my soul had been ripped been away and abandoned me on the ground bleeding in agony. Tears streaked my eyes as I farewelled my love. I watched as he was dragged away by the imperial fire benders, how he battled the entire way and screamed my name... How my body rat


Nothing could describe the immense pain in my heart when I forced myself out of Ikem's grip. It was as though a part of my body, my soul and my heart had been ripped been away from me left me on the ground bleeding in agony. Tears streaked my eyes as I farewelled my love. I watched as he was dragged away by the imperial fire benders, how he battled the entire way and screamed my name... How my body rattled at his calls, how desperately I wanted to run to him, wrap my arms around his waist and die, but it wasn't fair to him. My life was over, but Ikem, he still had a chance to live and I had no right to take that away. A gentle arm pulled my elbow; I looked at the soldier standing on my side. A look of sympathy revealed in his eyes,  
"We must leave. It is not good to keep the Fire lord waiting" he whispered to me. My throat was dry and my body felt weak. I felt myself shaking, my hands trembled but I willed myself to move.

I felt numb during the entire trip. It felt like a dream. My mind was a torrent of confusion, anger and fear. I found myself at times struggling to breath, struggling to fight and to comprehend what was happening. The image of Ikem returned to my mind, fresh and clear like the dew on morning grass. The scene replayed in my mind. I could see the utter desperation in his eyes and his movements. I heard his heartbreaking scream, the frightening and echoing way he called my name '_Ursa!' _ My heart could take it no longer; I broke down into tears and sobbed like a child.

The sun was now set in the middle of sky. The carriage door opened and I was escorted into the palace. An hour had passed in which I had managed the gather my faculties and compose myself. The tears had dried away and prepared myself for the Fire lord. The palace was beautiful and exquisite but it held a strange and mysterious darkness. The ceilings were high, the floors were polished marble and beautiful statues and ornaments decorated the ceilings and bases. We halted before a great door lined with gold and bronze ivory patterns. I gazed up the massive Fire Nation Emblem and swallowed hard. The door opened and I slowly made my way to meet Fire lord Azulon. I had tried to keep my eyes low and avert but my head inclined upwards to study the elderly man who sat on the throne. He was a narrow faced man, with wrinkles etched deeply into his skull. His eyes were a dark hazel that studied me with fervor. I glanced back to ground and bowed before the steps,

"Fire lord Azulon" I uttered, the elderly man stood up and made his way to me,

"Ursa, is it?" he asked, my head remained low but I could see from the shadows that he was peering and examining me, "Rise, let us have a good look"

I obeyed and stood up straight before the Fire lord. My eye met his briefly before they quickly flitted away scanned the rest of me,

"You are a quite satisfactory" he said nodding his head, "My son shall be pleased"

Immediately a form emerged from the shadows and stalked closer to us. My heart beat faster as I examined his face. The seriousness of his countenance, the hard line set in his jaw and solemnity in his eyes made my stomach churn. I felt sick. He joined his father's side and he repeated the same process of studying.

Something stirred inside of me as I watched those eyes. It was not fear, it was disgust. I felt like a toy being put on display. I immediately grew a disliking to the man, but I concealed it well. Ozai finally nodded. A smile spread across Azulon's thin lips,

"Then let the marriage be organised at once!" he ordered. He turned his back on me without a second glance. It was Ozai who remained behind. I felt his eyes burning on me. I glanced up and met his gaze. I cannot describe what I saw. It wasn't a friendly gaze or one of intimidation, it seemed rather…empty. I turned my eyes to floor but he remained standing and watching me a little longer. After what seemed like an eternity, his feet shifted and turned away, the soles of his shoes clicked lightly on the floor as he descended. I slowly looked up. That man….was to be my husband,

….

The days before the wedding flew by in a blur. I looked in the mirror and felt utterly hollow. How pretty that face in the mirror was. How beautiful the dress was with its floral ornaments and subtle, white creases. How elegantly her hair sat on her head, its dark tresses braided to resemble a crown, quite fitting for the occasion. Despite the amazing efforts of the kind girls, nothing could conceal sadness in my heart. It showed plainly on my face. Someone wrapped their fingers into mine. Slowly I looked down and met the face of a young girl, her face was full of sweetness I took pleasure in seeing it.

"Please Malady, try to smile" she asked in a sweet childish tone. I did smile and pressed my fingers against hers. I remained silent for the rest of the evening. Even as I walked down the aisle, my thoughts were indifferent. Even as the vows had been read, I showed no expression of happiness, fear or hate. Two golden chalices were filled with wine and a red ribbon was wrapped around each. It was the drinking of the wine that bound us in marriage. I ended up drinking the entire beverage despite being warned earlier that I was only to take a small sip. I passed the cup away and let the sweet burn of wine pour down my throat. I needed something to dull ache that was building in my heart. The ache belonged to Ikem and every moment I stood there felt like a betrayal to him. I could feel Ozai smiling at me. He indulged in my suffering. The crowd cheered and my eyes drew once more to the ground. _I'm sorry Ikem_.

It was then that I sensed Ozai shift beside me. I barely had a chance to register it when I felt the undeniable touch of his lips against my neck. My heart stopped and I felt cold all over. I heard the crowd cheer louder and wolf whistles bounced between the men. Children shied away and giggled while the elderly couples simply laughed. It was wrong. All of it. Ozai lingered a little longer. His face was concealed from my vision, but I could sense the despicable grin that played on his lips. Ever so slowly, he pulled his head back and turned to the crowd. His hand reached for mine and raised it into the air which another chaotic wave of screaming and jeering. As for me, I remained frozen.

…

The first few days of at the Fire Nation Palace took its toll on me. I cried myself to sleep every night for the first week. I shared a bed with Ozai but we slept on separate sides. He heard my sobs and whimpers at night but he didn't dare comfort of confront me. When morning arrived, I woke up and found he had already left. My heart sunk lower and the tears returned once more. I cannot recall when I had finally recovered my phase of my depression, but I believe it was on a bright and sunny day. Ozai and I barely interacted. I fervently wondered what the point of the marriage was. We hadn't touched each other since the kiss at the wedding, much less spoke. I entered the courtyards as it was the only place I found solace. I sat on the bench and pondered about Ikem, my village and the unknown future that waited. The familiar heaviness in my chest returned and I lowered my gaze from the blue skies and instead watched the ants that crawled across the gravel path. They bustled busily, completely oblivious of me.

"Ursa?" spoke a gentle voice. I glanced upwards and met a chubby faced man, with thick sideburns and a long dark beard. I recognised him as Ozai's brother and I immediately got to my knees.

"Oh no! That is unnecessary, you are family now!" Iroh replied, quickly hurrying over to pull me back up. His touch was gentle but strong. I stood up and smiled, bowing my head before sitting back on the seat. Iroh smiled and sat beside me.

"I hear you have been quite sad these past few days" he said. I nodded my head and let out a deep sigh.

"I miss my home" I replied. Iroh nodded,

"Yes. It's a terrible thing to be torn away from your home" he paused and was silent for a moment. He took a deep breath and sighed, his fingers fumbled with the hemline of his shirt for a while. I could sense he had something to tell me,

"But I believe it is worse" he began once again,

"When you are torn away from someone you love"

A spasm jerked my body and I turned to Iroh. My heartbeat quickened and my body fell numb once more. How did he know about Ikem? Iroh held a sympathetic smile; he reached out and placed a hand on my shoulder.

"The soldiers told me about the ordeal at Hi'raa"

I pursed my lips, "Yes" was all I could utter

"Ursa. I cannot understand the pain you are going through but I need to offer you wisdom in this time of need" his voice had deepened and the atmosphere was heavier,

"My brother tells me you have been having restless nights, you cry every day and you are slowly becoming an insomniac"

Ursa knew this.

"But I don't think you realise that Ozai knows why you are upset and it is beginning to irritate him"

Ozai. How I hated that name but curiosity hindered my anger for brief moment,

"He knows? Well, why does he keep me then?"

Iroh sighed, "Ursa. It's best not to question such things" he replied bluntly,

"Things may seem calm at the moment but it will change. My brother may seem like a cold heartless man, but he is not, well, not always. I've seen good in him but it is subdued by Azulon's teachings and expectations. Ozai is still young but he has much to learn and he has feelings like anyone else"

I didn't reply. Iroh's voice had altered and become more pleading,

"Ursa I beg you. You need to put an end to this grief. I entreat to leave your past behind and focus on the present, more importantly, on Ozai"

I shook my head, "But why? I'm the one suffering"

Iroh let out a deep sigh, "We are in a war, Ursa. Living in dark times and my brother is not someone you'd want to get angry. But I do earnestly believe there is good in him and it is selfish of me to think this, but I believe that his heart can be softened"

"Me" She mumbled. Iroh slowly nodded his head, "He is interested you…he just doesn't know what do, he's rather clueless such things"

Ursa found this hard to believe, but Iroh's pleading was hard to ignore, "I shall talk to him, properly, at dinner tonight" Ursa replied

Iroh smiled and held Ursa's hand softly, "Thank-you Ursa. I promise you, great blessings will come your way"

I finally looked up and stared back at Iroh. His eyes glistened and his genuine and kind smile lightened my heart. He quickly kneeled and kissed my hand,

"Ursa, Please do not hesitate to talk to me. I will be staying here for the next couple of days, long enough to train the new recruits for the siege of Ba-sing-se" he gripped my hand more tightly and tried to catch my attention.

"If you ever wish to be in great company or drink some of the finest tea, be sure to knock on my door" I nodded my head gently and watched as he slowly drew away. After he had turned away and vanished from my view, I felt lonely. My eyes immediately drew to the ground once more,_ When was the last time anyone had spoken to me? _I couldn't recall any association these past few days... I looked around at my destitute surroundings and realized I had become a recluse. My head hung low, my nails dug deep into my skull and I thought hard

_What was happening...What was I going to to do? I couldn't possibly love Ozai. He was too heartless...too vindictive...or was he?_

My opinion of Ozai was based on the brief interaction upon my arrival. The way his eyes examined me like I was nothing more than a mere tool, I despised it. I couldn't stand the cold emptiness of those hazel eyes or the quiet and distant temperament he showed towards me. I longed for affection, but Ozai; I believed, was incapable of such. I wanted Ikem; I wanted my love, my home…

I was at war with myself for those tenuous minutes upon my wooden bench. I considered everything and thought deeply about my actions and what I was to do. I pulled at my hair, the loose strands falling from all sides. Tears of frustration streamed my cheeks once more and I grew impatient with my indecisiveness. Finally, I stopped.

There was no reason to sulk any more. It was useless; I had to make the best of my situation. My future was vague and unclear, but I knew one thing. Ozai was my husband whether I liked it or not. For the next few days I would endeavor to befriend this strange man. I would try my best to please him, show him respect and hope my life should improve. Even if he shunned me, as I believed he would, Iroh would become my companion. There were also my ladies-in-waiting; they would no doubt support me during this difficult battle. I forced myself upon two legs.

Whatever the future held, Let it come to me. I was determined to fight all the way.


End file.
